Why do women stay I’m abusive relationships?
Why do they subject themselves to the emotional and physical pain and rape brought upon them by narcissistic sadistic men?
There are actually so many scary reasons WHY?
FEAR is the primary reason why they do not leave the relationship. Fear of being alone. Some women are afraid of becoming independent and constantly doubt themselves. Many women are afraid of the physical consequences of leaving an abusive partner. It is wrong to assume that women are attracted to the “bad boy” types. Most relationships start off in a positive way. Most abusive men are not abusive during the beginning of a relationship. On the contrary, most of these men are quite charming and act very gentleman-like, and it is this kind and gentle behavior of theirs that attracts the woman to them. Aside from just being nice and seemingly caring, these men may show certain emotional vulnerabilities with this woman (for example, they may share a sad/tragic story or event that occurred in their life) which may add to the charm factor. Often, even when the very first acts of abuse occur, a while afterwards the man will often return to his charming ways by acting and feeling very apologetic and doing and becoming romantic again to appease the woman.
Some women simply do not even realize that they are in an abusive relationship. These women are certainly not ignorant. If their friends, colleagues, or others go through similar abuse, they can easily see that this is abuse. However, they fail to believe they themselves could be victims of abuse. This maybe especially true of highly educated and/or accomplished women who are successful in other areas of life.
SHAME – Some woman may feel ashamed that they have tolerated such abuse and they may avoid telling others, even close friends and family. The society and culture that a woman lives in can affect her decisions as well. In certain societies, divorce is still looked down upon, so women may feel that they will be judged by others if they leave an abusive marriage.
Damaged self-esteem After a period of time, the abuse may start affecting the woman’s mental health and well-being. She may start believing that she is unworthy of being treated with love and respect.
PTSD – the victim may be impacted so much by the abuse that they completely separate or disassociate themselves with the abuse. This individual may eventually start displaying symptoms of PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder). At this stage, the victim is in trauma (due to the abuse) and this detachment from the trauma is unhealthy, but it is the way the victim is trying to cope with their trauma. According to psychologists, some of the symptoms of PTSD include:
Trouble remembering important aspects of the traumatic event
Negative thoughts about oneself and the world/ Having distorted feelings like guilt or self-blame
Loss of interest in the activities that they once enjoyed
PTSD is a very dangerous state to be in for anyone, but especially for abuse victims, because they may feel further isolated from friends and family and it prevents them from seeing the abuse as the real problem that it is. PTSD may inhibit the victim from taking the necessary steps to leave.
Men are good at manipulation and this method is often used on insecure women.
General cycle of abuse and eventually the victim becomes trapped into the vicious cycle of violence and they have emotional trouble leaving.
The next time you see or hear of anyone who is the victim don’t judge them for staying in an abusive relationship.